It is not uncommon for people who have experienced trauma to distance themselves from family members who have hurt them. This is often done in an effort to protect oneself from further harm. And while it is understandable to want to distance oneself from someone who has caused pain, it is important to be mindful of the way in which this separation is accomplished.
One of the most important things to remember when setting boundaries with family members is that you have a right to do so. You are not obligated to allow anyone—even family—to remain in your life if they are not respecting your wishes or causing you harm. It is also important to be clear about what your boundaries are and why you are setting them. For example, if you do not want to see or speak to a certain family member, be clear about this boundary and why it is in place. This will help you stick to your boundary even when you are feeling weak or vulnerable.
It is also important to remember that just because someone is family, doesn't mean they get a free pass. Just because someone is related to you, doesn't mean they are entitled to your time, energy, or resources. You get to decide how you want to spend your time and with whom you want to associate yourself—regardless of blood relation.
Finally, it is crucial to understand that setting boundaries with family members can be difficult and upsetting for everyone involved. Be prepared for pushback and resistance. But know that ultimately, you have a right to set boundaries as needed in order t protect yourself from further harm.
If you have experienced trauma at the hands of a family member, it is understandable that you would want to put some distance between yourself and that person. And while setting boundaries can be difficult, it is important to do so in a way that is respectful and mindful of everyone involved. Remember, you have a right to set boundaries as needed in order to protect yourself from further harm—regardless of blood relation.
Feel free to connect with me to assist you in setting those boundaries.